Coffee With Denise is a week in the making this week.
My dishwasher is officially broken.
Okay, it’s been broken since the day my husband put it in for me. And that isn’t a knock on my husband, how was he to know that the one we picked up from the store has a not working motor in it? I have read that it is a super nice Kitchenaid dishwasher and when the repair man came over yesterday and informed me it’s not even a little bit working, I wanted to say, “I’VE BEEN TELLING EVERYONE THAT!” but they were so nice that I did not and I did not even sigh when their appointment that took place between 12-5 on Wednesday would be a fix it appointment on Monday between 8-11.
Last week I was gone all week long. My “days off” were completely filled up and while I had fun I have been overwhelmed by everything undone here at home.
I have a planner I like to write in every day. I am two weeks behind in it. I feel like everything in our home as well as my relationships are faltering and I am barely squeaking by.
For instance, it took me ALL AFTERNOON Sunday to get all the dishes done. Getting all the dishes done meant not getting the laundry taken care of. By Tuesday night, all the counter and the oven were filled with dirty dishes and boys were hollering for someone to bring them a towel every time they got out of the shower.
And here is where I tell you an odd bit of personality quirk I have.
Actually, S4 says it’s one of his favorite things about me.
I can usually make up a song about any situation.
I take a tune and just change it to what I am feeling.
This week I have had two made up songs going through my head on repeat. Any moment I fear I may begin singing them out loud. I can’t sing well, this could be traumatizing. Also, I am sure to offend with my music.
I should preface this to say that my Pandora selection is truly unique. S1 usually walks away with his head shaking in disbelief I can listen to such varied music but I like to point out how well rounded his music knowledge has become because I am his mama.
One day he will be grateful.
Every time I see the baskets and piles of clothes and stacks of dishes or think of what I should put on my to do list only to not make a to do list because there is so much to add to it, I start singing in my head:
“I’m overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed by these diiiishes.” Dishes was today but really, it can be anything. I look at the laundry and I’m instantly singing “I’m overwhelmed.” The song, which is a Christian song about loving God, makes me feel depressed and heavy and, well, overwhelmed.
That said, I and two of my friends have had this constant conversation lately:
“I wish I would just learn what ever it is I am suppose to learn so this trial can be over.”
We all have those times in our life that we want to be over. Get me through this season and good riddance. The three of us have had quite the year and it’s odd that we all are experiencing very different things that we have changed us dramatically this year.
It’s been the year of change.
Change can be awesome! But change takes work. And we are all exhausted and the trials we are going through we want to have over so we can finally rest a bit.
And every time I feel overcome by what is going on, I start singing this…
“My God can move mountains, He can work a miracle, work a miracle.”
This song my youngest especially can jam to because they blared it on the loudspeaker at his first home game Saturday that happens to be the FIRST GAME THEY WON all this whole long football season.
It’s catchy, isn’t it? And it’s stuck in my head all the live long day long. My version. I can add all kind of lyrics to this. I am pretty sure when Fall Out Boy put this song out they never considered some middle aged woman washing dishes would be singing this with all her might: “My God can move mountains, He can work a miracle, work a miracle!”
But that’s how my spiritual journey works.
And now you know.