On Sunday, my husband and I had a big ol’ fight.
As I was canning grape juice, something I have never done before, my husband came in bearing an arm load of tomatoes. “Here’s some tomatoes.”
“Where did you find them?” I asked.
“On the porch.” And then he added….. “But oh no, you had to go buy some.”
On a week that I had hardly been home, I stopped at our local grocery store to get a few last minute ingredients to make a taco salad for a football game potluck. My taco salad recipe requires tomatoes and I asked the boys if we had any tomatoes left at home.
“Nope,” they assured me so I picked up the smallest bunch of tomatoes I could find. I made up the taco salad, brought it to our homecoming football potluck and had a great time.
My husband never ate the taco salad.
Later, he held up the tomatoes by our sink in the kitchen and cried, “What’s this?”
“Tomatoes”, I shrugged, “I needed them for the taco salad.”
“We have tomatoes!” he cried indignantly.
I was like, “Cool, we have tomatoes and I don’t have to buy them anymore.” And that was all there was to that conversation.
On Sunday he began bringing armloads of tomatoes into the kitchen and dropping them on the counter where I was making the grape juice. “Here are the tomatoes you didn’t see. They were on the porch.”
I could tell he was a wee bit irritated with me.
Then he brought another arm load of tomatoes into the house. “What are all the tomatoes for?” I asked, my hackles beginning to raise.
“I don’t know, you seem to think you need to buy them,” he snapped.
“FOR ONE TACO SALAD!” I shouted. Apparently, I had snapped.
“Well, how am I suppose to know? You are the one going out buying store bought tomatoes when we have perfectly good ones I GREW HERE.”
Now, in this moment I knew how ridiculous this was. I knew this was from us being over tired and over run and over being over crazy busy. But I couldn’t stop the argument.
And neither could he.
“Oh, well, next time I guess I’ll just check with you before I buy anything at the grocery store for a meal!”
“Maybe you should!”
“Yah, cuz I have a big habit of wasting money on things we already have! Maybe I should just buy, oh, I don’t know…zucchini. Squash!” These are things I had on my kitchen table that had come from our garden.
“You seem to like to buy TOMATOES!”
“Well, I guess I won’t be doing THAT again!”
I turn to work on the juice but there are tomatoes all over. “What am I supposed to do with all these?”
“Well, I guess I’ll sell them at the stand if you aren’t going to use them.”
“Well, I guess you should since I wasted all that money on tomatoes! Get your money back!”
And he stormed out the door. And I shoved grapes in a jar.
A few minutes later he came back in with….a matchbook.
“You got paid in a book of matches,” he said, “They stole that box of tomatoes I put out there cuz it was gone right away and this matchbook was in the money box.”
Yes, we really are the grown adults in this household. We really did offer the week before to give a favorite couple marriage advice and be mentors to them as they embark on their marriage journey later this week. We really had just left church where we were all happy happy joy joy.
And we got in a fight over TOMATOES.
This is real life, people. We aren’t perfect. We have big fights over tomatoes in the hearing of our children. We sulk – me in the kitchen and he outside in his garden. And later he comes in and kisses me. And I kiss him with a sheepish grin.
And plan to never buy tomatoes again. Ever.
But, because I am evil like this…I made him a sandwich for his lunch and made sure to add big huge slices of juicy tomato to it.